November?!

Seriously?  I have to wait until November for our trial for custody and child support??!!  I filed the paperwork back in December and I have to wait almost a YEAR to put it behind me?!  I am so..... defeated.

This is the longest year of my life.  I will be living with my parents until this is all over so I can afford to pay my lawyer, and it's not going to be over anytime soon.  I wish that it could just be done.  That we would be divorced and have everything decided already. 

He tried to explain to the judge why he hasn't done his court ordered drug therapy:  He made the appointment and went, but the referral wasn't there, so he couldn't be seen.  He had to wait 3 weeks until the referral went through, but then  he was working and couldn't get time off of work to go.  BULLSHIT!!!  I have had to get MANY referrals from our doctor for MANY specialists, one being a therapist, so I know how long it takes.  I know that you don't even NEED a referral to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.  I also know that he was unemployed for 2 months- plenty of time to go.  I ALSO know that as of June 1st, he is no longer insured on my health plan and it will be a hell of a lot harder for him to get it done. 

What it comes down to is that he has never done anything on his own.  I've always done it for him.  I'm not there to make his appointment and make sure that he goes, so it's not getting done.  That and the fact that he won't stop smoking weed.

I hate how this makes me sound.  I feel like a bitter bitch, but I can't keep taking care of him!  I have to stand up for myself and my kids.  It's better late than never, right?